Wednesday, January 9, 2008

Someone call a doctor....it's my heart

We've been having some discipline problems with the Princess lately. Tantrums, defiance, pushing her brother; all behaviours that are out of the norm for her. I think we got to the root of it this morning.....make that 3:30 this morning.

"Mom! Mommy!" I stumbled out of my bed and went to hers. Climbed under the covers and gave her a cuddle. Ten minutes later we heard a wail from the other room. I kissed the Princess's head and climbed back out of bed to go and feed the boy. As I left the room I heard an anguished cry:

"Mommy, you were mine first! You were mine first!" I picked Bad up and brought him into her room so that we could talk while I nursed him. (I tried to get some spousal assistance, but it was patently NOT forthcoming.)

"I like when you're with ME Mommy."

"I like being with you too sweetheart."

"You spend too much time being with Bad. I liked it when you were all mine."

"I miss having more time with you too hon, but your brother needs me. I love you both."

"When Bad be's naughty you pick him up and laugh and play with him. Why don't you do that when I be's naughty?"

Could I get some help picking my heart up off the floor and putting it back together now, please?

16 comments:

bananafana said...

that's one of the things I'm so afraid is going to happen when the new baby comes. Already O tells me that he needs me "all to hisself" and then tells his father that I'm all his for awhile if we haven't had enough one-on-one time to suit his tastes. It breaks my heart!!! I'm already planning outings for the two of us in my head so it can be just us every once in awhile. Poor Princess! Too bad it sucks being the older sibling sometimes

Family Adventure said...

Wow...that is amazingly perceptive for a little girl. I am very impressed!

Still, it is hard to be in two places at once! But you'll have to see if you can squeeze in some more "girl only" time for your little princess.

Heidi

Type (little) a aka Michele said...

aww

Don Mills Diva said...

Grab mine while you're down there - that was a really touching post.

Anonymous said...

Awe. It's tough being the oldest. But we get over it. Trust me.
I wish most adults were so good at expressing their feelings.

painted maypole said...

oh, ouch.

and so, so honest.

Mighty Morphin' Mama said...

Wow, how amazing that she could explain all that to you! What a terrific girl, and even if it breaks your heart, she gave you a gift. A little reminder to give her lots of positive attention for positive behavior.
The balance is so hard, isn't it? Never mind the guilt you feel already. oy. poor you!

Jennifer (Jen on the Edge) said...

If I promise that it will get better, will you believe me?

tesilein said...

Yikes. That's tough. It's so hard to keep things "equal."

Victoria said...

Oh, crap. Sigh. It gets...different, if not better. My Boy recently told me he liked being an only child better. Ouchie.

Good luck to Princess. She'll get it all figured out soon.

Take care.

familymclean said...

Oh gosh! What a smart little princess!
Now I am kinda glad mine are so close....one thing that we avoided was this:)
Your poor Heart!

Veronica Foale said...

Ouch. At least you know now what is causing the bad behaviour.

I hear bubble gum and kisses are good for broken hearts.

Anonymous said...

Awwww that's so sweet and sad too. My folks tell me that I told them to take my little brother back to the hospital because I didn't want him anymore. I, however, don't remember saying that and we get along fine now. Things will get better.

shay said...

Oh! How amazing is she?

It will get better. I promise!

Suzanne said...

Ouch. I still feel like I'm stretched a little too thin, but I do think it has gotten better as the kids have gotten older.

Unknown said...

Awwww! What a truly touching post. That just really makes the heart hurt when I read that! I can sympathize with the princess, as I loved having mom all to myself before Middle Bro and Baby Bro were born. Of course, that was over 30 years ago, but the feeling was still similar.

There's only 1 year and a half difference in age between Middle Bro and me. When mom used to give Middle Bro his bottle, I'd run to the kitchen, open the fridge, snatch up one of his bottles and scooter to my room. I'd lay in my "big girl bed" and drink his bottle. Mom used to feel so sorry for me and that she didn't get to spend enough time alone with me. I think she felt that Middle Bro came too soon and I was feeling left out.

The good thing about the princess being a girl is that you can do all sorts of mommy and daughter things together :) Now, that's something special, isn't it? :)

I guess I won't tell you about the time I was 2 yrs old and accidentally put Middle Bro's hand through my grandmother's sewing machine and sewed his hand! I swear, I was only 2 and can assure you that I had no idea what sibling rivalry was at that time!